"If I knew that this run would make NO DIFFERENCE AT ALL in the shape and size of my body, would I still go?"
I'm constantly battling diet culture in my own heart and mind. I'm tempted to see my body as broken, imperfect, lazy, and distracting from the real me, even though I know it's actually really healthy, works well, and accurately represents me and all the good things I've done with it. (You know—age, birth babies, retire from a professional athletic career, etc.)
I also really enjoy exercise. I like moving. It clears my head. It opens my eyes. It quiets the noise that constantly buzzes in my brain. And yet, there are moments that I start to head out only in an attempt to coerce my body into a different shape and size. I hate that I tend to punish and hurt myself because of a stupid, irrational beauty standard that paints humans as unilateral.
So I check myself with the above question. If the answer is no, I sit with it and speak kindly to my body until I can honestly answer yes, so that my body and I can live in peace and just enjoy the run.
Unsplash photo cred: Artem Sapegin